So, after years of visiting a fansite just to hang out with the amazing people there (even though I wasn't even slightly a fan anymore), the webmaster of TMS has decided to make the coolest forum in the universe:

thingsmadeofawesome.com

Go there. Now.

Seriously.

It's like book club-meets-movie reviews-meets-funland-meets-chat time-meets-eyecandy-meets-random coolness.... it goes on and on and on.

There literally is something for everyone, whether you want to post pics and poetry, or that really cool video you found on youtube using a random word search or just look at teh pretty that is Robert Pattinson. (Oh, Edward... *sigh*)

But what makes the site super cool? The people. (The amazing people who I went to the old site just to visit... they are now on the new site, and are still amazing. The place is full of warm, friendly people who are excited to meet new people. Oh, and the webmaster is hot... but let's not focus on that.... okay... well, maybe for a little while. Mmmm... Adora... *love*

Perfection.

And um, why aren't you already clicking the link? WHY!??!?!!

You really should do it just because I said.

Obey the MoD!

Compliance is required. Thank you.

Comment on this post, I'll give you a letter, you post your ten favourite songs starting with that letter.

</a></b></a>wannabonefatone gave me the letter T


1. These Foolish Things -- Billie Holiday
2. Thinking About You -- Radiohead
3. Tomorrow, Wendy -- Concrete Blond
4. Touch Me -- The Doors
5. Tree Top Flyer -- Stephen Stills
6. Tupelo Honey -- Van Morrison
7. Til Kingdom Come -- Coldplay
8. Time After Time -- Eva Cassidy
9. This Road -- Jars of Clay
10. This Is How I Disappear -- My Chemical Romance

The power of art isn't in the words or the paint or the clay...

Hands, thoughts, souls poured into art... thats the power of it. That's the place where art transcends the art form and reaches inside of us to become part of who we are.

It's escape.
It's a place to hide from all the shit in our lives.
It's the living of a fantasy that warms us when our realities are too cold to bear.

Art is what lifts us up above...

above survival instincts
above the mundane
above rules and sanctimony
above ourselves

So what does that make the artist?

A mentor?
A spiritual leader?
A goddess?

No.... No, that's the beauty of art. Because we are the artist... even when we didn't touch it. Because all of us living together have created an environment for art to exist. Because we breathe, one of us can breathe onto the page, another into her clay. Because we love, one of us can open her mouth and cry her anguish out in song. Because we are... because we feel... because we know... because we exist... art is born in the souls of everyone.

The artist is just a vessel. A vessel for the lifeforce of an individual, a body that can miraculously contain a soul.

The artist, then, has but one task. She must be willing.

Power always has a price. And for our artist, the price is exposure.

She must be willing to strip herself bare and stand up on a table in the center of the room and tear down all of the walls we spend a lifetime erecting. She must pour herself out for all to see, leaving nothing behind, until she is empty.

And there... in the mess... that is where art is.

It's sticky and nasty and full of sites and sounds and smells that we aren't ready to confront. But the purity of it stabs our hearts. So we go there... to that messy escape of art, and we nestle in and let the scent of it seep into our hair. We revel in the stains it leaves on our skin. For a few seconds we open ourselves up to the meanings and the messages and the transcendence of it all.. until we are finally, finally free.

And none of us can walk away unchanged.

Instead of reviewing, because I know next to nothing about dance... I either like it or I am indifferent or I hate it... I thought I'd just post my favorite performances of the night and say why. Because I love this show in amazing ways. I love almost everything about it... for real.

( Oh love... )

stole this from odayski

( I'm a Groundbreaking Thinker... woo! )

I love this quote. I love this quote so much that I'm going to post it again, just so that some day I'll come back and read it and remember that I love this quote.

You should love this quote too.



I am so beautiful, sometimes people weep when they see me. And it has nothing to do with what I look like really. It is just that I gave myself the power to say that I am beautiful, and if I could do that, maybe there is hope for them too. And the great divide between the beautiful and the ugly will cease to be. Because we are all what we choose. -- Margaret Cho

Because I'm living in fantasyland today:



And maybe if that was the opening act for this:



... and then I would have to quit my job and follow them around the country. Just sayin'.

This is it… the final episode of one of the best Idol seasons ever… and yes, I admit that the hype wasn’t all overplayed. But before we can find out who takes home the title, we have two full hours of performances and fun.

Um… so, filler. And I have this feeling that we might just see Ryan schilling products and various Fox movies and shows… so, a normal results show night. Huh.

But this is new and improved filler!! With celebrities!

The show starts with David C. and David A. facing each other under the spotlight. How they kept from laughing, I’ll never know. Because I would have totally busted up and ruined Ryan’s fun. (But Ryan likes it when I’m naughty.)

The cameras pan the audience to show off celebrities, who I remember from various television shows in the 80s and 90s, but whose names I’ve never known or cared to know. They all have kids now, though!

97.5 million votes came in last night… and the totals were 56% to 44%. Not as close as everyone seemed to think... but still amazing.

But true to form, ex Idols are in the home towns to show us how much the top 2 are loved. Say what you want, but I still love Matt Rogers in lovetastic ways.

The performances start with SYTYCD stars flanking the Top 12, with everyone in Finale white. The camera is a little spastic, trying to show us all the stars at once, but I'm sure we'll see them later on in all of their glory.

When we come back from break, the Davids are dueting on "Heroes," where we learn that the sound men suck at blending (um… duh), and that David C. is way better at harmonies. But it’s a super cool moment, and I have love for it… not just because my love David C. is wearing a black leather jacket. *purrrr*

Wait… is that Ryan schilling a Fox movie? Yes! Yes it is!

The boys got a private viewing of Mike Meyers’ new movie, The Love Guru. And in a moment of fancy greatness, the boys actually get to meet Mike Meyers in character. Oh love. He offers up advice… he tells David Cook to shave and David Archuleta not to tug at his pubic hair. WHA?!?! omg. I love Mike Meyers so much! And when Cook finally lost it, I was almost crying I was laughing so hard. This should tell you a lot about my jacked up sense of humor.

Highlights:
• His whispered love to Simon.
• Mr. Seafoam.
• Ryan on the floating pillow of fear almost killing a cameraman.

Syesha is up next singing “Waiting for You” with a special guest: Seal. Get out! Which makes me jealous of Syesha for the first time ever. Wow. You can so tell that she’s intimidated beyond all… and deservedly so. Too cool.

And did anyone notice how hard it was for Paula to get back in her seat in that dress? Classic!

Back from the break, Jason Castro takes the stage to reprise “Hallelujah.” And my lowered expectations of reprises are blown away. He really is brilliant on that song. Despite obvious nerves, he manages to create intimacy in a 7000 seat stadium. Blows my mind.

And instead of the top two in a Ford commercial this year, we get a bloopers real of the top 12 in all their various commercials to the tune, “Let the Good Times Roll.” Cute!

Ryan brings the Davids out… and gives them A NEW CAR! Yeah… and this year, they get Escape Hybrids. Nice! I actually forgot they did that.

But the girls are up next singing Donna Summer hits. Group sing badness. And Amanda looks miserable… and the choreography is horrid. But it’s fun to hear Amanda sing. And we’re reminded yet again that she should have outlasted Ramiele. And then Donna Summer comes out to sing her new single. (She’ll be in my town this month. I know you're all jealous.) It’s not a bad song, but I’ve never been a huge fan, so… Was that Ryan trying to dance?

But then Donna sings “Last Dance,” and she sounds great, which is why we love her. She hands the mic off to Syesha, who probably should have sung that song in 70s week, for real.

More commercials… blah.

Carly Smithson and Michael Johns are dueting next, singing “The Letter.” I was actually hoping they’d reprise their “One” performance from Ellen. If you haven’t seen it… go to YouTube… now. The band is a little Brady Bunch Hour on this song, but these two are so fantastic singing together that I don’t care. They should totally tour… opening for Cook in the Fall.

What? A girl can dream, right?

Jimmy Kimmel is up next to roast the show again. It was okay… but the Simon montage was giggle-worthy.

The top 6 guys are up next singing Bryan Adams songs? Could it be?!?

So… true confessions time: It’s just possible that I’m a closet Bryan Adams lover. So you’ll excuse me while I SQUEE LIKE MAD when he comes out to sing! It’s like my dream night! Oh love. Needless to say, seeing Cook’s arm around Bryan Adams made my heart go: *happy sigh* How Idol loves me.

Jordin Sparks does a commercial for the new Disney American Idol Experience theme park event...

Oh Lord... they really are taking over the world.

And then… just the coolest moment. David Cook joins ZZ Top to sing “Sharp Dressed Man.” Niiiiiice. Fangirl smile? Check. And Cook even pulls out the ZZ moves! Just too great.

Brooke White is up next singing “Teach Your Children well,” with Graham Nash. Coolest guest stars ever this year! Seriously. God, this song reminds me of my childhood. Perfect for Brooke.

And for those of you who totally missed it… we enter the second hour of the show with a special present just for me:

My love David Cook lip syncs “Old Time Rock ‘n Roll” Tom Cruise style for a Guitar Hero commercial. Um… pant-less… Um… I think I can’t breathe. WHAT?!?! That collective thud you just heard was all of his fangirls dying on the floor.

Luckily for you, my beloved husband The Lumberjack managed to revive me, and after I watched it over again a few dozen times (to make sure I accurately depicted it in my review… of course), he also reminded me that there was more finale to watch.

Three more rewinds, and I was ready to move on… ish.

Did I mention he was not wearing pants?

Is the room spinning?

I have no idea who is on the stage right now. But they look barely pubescent and like they belong on a Disney show… so I can only guess these are The Jonas Brothers. I think that’s Sanjaya’s cousin on tambourine. He sings slightly better… but seriously. Remember when TPTB brought us awesomeness like The Monkees? I miss those days.

Ryan has a random woman on stage with him who is pimping Randy’s suit with more style. Her name is Pat, and he uses her to introduce the tape of bad auditions. I fast forward. Once is enough. Of course, after that, they bring out that white feathered boy with the Best Friend Forever song. And then there’s a marching band and cheerleaders… and I’m starting to think that the lack of oxygen during the Cook commercial scrambled my brain. Is this really happening? And then Randy and Paula go up on stage to dance with them, and I’m pretty sure someone slipped drugs into the Coke cups tonight. That has to be it…

Right?

… I need another glass of wine.

One Republic is up next singing “Apologize.” Cool band. Cool song. So I’m just going to sit back and enjoy it. And then David Archuleta comes out to sing with them… and I see a whole new side of him. Could Archie turn out a cool record after all?

Probably in a couple of years. Once he ditches the baggage promoting him (whether that’s his dad or the Idol crew), and grows up a bit so he can spin out some fantastic lyrics… I bet he could totally find a niche in this genre. He doesn’t quite keep up with Ryan Tedder, but still. Josh Groban's market share might just be safe after all! Coolest performance from DA ALL SEASON LONG.

Jordin Sparks comes out to sing “One Step at a Time.” Well… I should say she skips out onto the stage… *sigh* Then she tip-toes around the stage… because the song, it's about stepping. And in case you didn't realize that, she totally is acting it out for you.

... I might have fast forwarded a little. The Lumberjack says I just cheated… but come on, people. I sat through that Jonas Brothers shit. That should count for something!

I did stop in time to see Blake Lewis singing along from the audience. He’s still my favorite cutie from last season.

A digital recreation of a super young Gladys night with Ben Stiller, Jack Black, and Robert Downey Jr. as pips… :haha; Better than the creeptastic Elvis thing from last year. Everything Jack Black does makes me laugh. Ev.er.y.thing. I’m a freak like that.

Carrie Underwood is up next singing “Last Name.” There’s some kind of squealing coming from the New York area. If you can’t hear it… you’re not listening. But I think she raided Dolly Parton’s old wardrobe trunks for her outfit tonight. Seriously.

The Top 12 come out one last time to perform a George Michael song… which makes me think he’s here tonight. The girls sing “Faith,” and the boys sing “Father Figure,” which Michael Johns pulls off in so many sexy ways. They end the medley with “Freedom,” and of course… the entrance of George Michael.

Sorry to the GM fans, but he’s so affected, over dramatic in bad ways, and his voice is definitely fading. Paula is crying… but that’s no great feat. And I’m just waiting for it to be over because my Tivo is all caught up now. Eh.

Oh… and he has a cold, which could explain the bad vocals. Sadness for him! He's still an affected bastard.

Only five minutes left, and it’s time to crown a winner. GAH!

The judges blather… and I don’t care. (Although Simon apologizes, which I love.)
Some random accountant comes out… and I DON’T CARE.
And just about the time I’m ready to reach through my television and throttle Ryan… he reads the results:

The winner of AI Season 7 is… David COOK!!!! OMG!

I squee and freak out in big bad ways. You can tell DC doesn’t know what to do with himself. And then he starts to cry, and great… now I’m crying, and TLJ is mocking me openly. I’m just too happy for him. He totally deserves it.

He sings the coronation song of suck… which sucks less because he’s singing it. It’s called “This is the Time.” And I love that he brings all the contestants out onto the riser with him. And I love how emotional he lets himself be. And I love him.

And I honestly couldn’t ask for a better ending to a really great season.

So... in all of that happiness and bliss, I'm saving the rest of my doom until next year…

(And it's just possible that I'm rewinding to the Guitar Hero commercial one more... a few more... to my own death and doom. HA!)

So, I have to admit that this is a sad, sad night for me. It’s the second to the last show, and I’m NOT READY!!

Add to that Cheese Factor-10 with the boxing ridiculousness at the beginning of the show, and I’m like…

“But where’s my Ryan?”

But then he comes out in all his gorgeous splendor. *purrr* Wow, and it’s a giant stadium of a thing, the Nokia. More boxing blahness. *yawn* But it looks like they brought back Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber to mentor the boys. Very cool!

Ryan brings them out and asks them predictable questions, then looks to the judges table for advice.

Randy: Drop it.
Paula: Soak it all in. (And in case they haven’t said it enough… she reminds them that we’re in the NOKIA™ theater.)
Simon: Hate your opponent.

But they don’t, of course. The Davids exchange fantastic love, and then… a commercial break. This is Idol, afterall.

Because Clive Davis sucked hard at song selections last year… they decided to promote him to selecting one of the songs for the top 2. Oh sadness.

And his choice for Cook? U2’s “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For.”

God, I’m going to seriously hate this boxing crap by the end of the night. *sigh*

My love David Cook starts off quietly with a guitar as his back. And when he brings it up, it doesn’t quite hit the energy that it could. But everything changes when he goes out on the riser. The camera shot was amazing, showing him in front of this huge audience, cast in blue lights. Just really cool. And I think that’s when the energy really started to build. It was really good. Nothing new or surprising about it, but definitely a great vocal and fantastic performance.

Clive’s choice for Archuleta? “Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me” by Elton John.

David Archuleta starts off on the steps. And for just a minute it was so reminiscent of Sir Elton… and not in a copycat way. It’s like he got the cool vibe of the original or something. But when he stood up for the chorus, that all changed for me, and he reverted to his balladeering ways. A truly great vocal, until close to the end, where he lost his way on the ad libs a bit. But the boy can sing ballads like no one else. Do I think it’s the best performance of the season? No, Randy… I don’t. But he’s a sweetheart of a thing, and you can tell how emotional he is about the night. But he almost has a heart attack when Simon told him that Round 1 = Archuleta.

I’m not sure whether to route for him to win Round 2 or not. Wow.

Cook’s next song choice is from the songwriter’s competition--“Dream Big.” And he pretty much killed me with the guitar and leather jacket… but putting my fangirliness behind me (yeah, right), it’s very pop rock… which isn’t my favorite of his rock styles. But he actually managed to work it out. Not a fantastic song, truthfully. And it looks like despite earlier predictions, the judges are definitely not excited about Cook’s offerings tonight. Simon’s right, though, it’s not an anthemy, inspirational ballad of suck… which may be why I could tolerate it.

Now, onto the anthemy, inspirational ballad of suck…

Archuleta chooses “In this Moment,” which screams coronation song just in its title alone. And it is… typical AI ballad of wrong for the finale show. If I’m being honest, I thought it was safe and unimpressive. I know, I’m being hard on him, and I’m a total biased fangirl for Cook. But I actually thought Paula said it best… another heartfelt performance. Nothing special or grand about it. Blah. But Simon hands him Round 2… and I’m starting to see a trend.

The final song is the contestant’s choice, and David Cook chose “The World I Know,” by Collective Soul, which is a fantastic, fantastic song. He starts off with just an acoustic guitar, totally destroying me forever. He builds it up slowly, and then ends it just hauntingly and emotionally. And then he cries, and I cry… and GOD I love him. Randy reminds us that he should already be making records. Paula gives him a standing ovation. Simon is being a jackass… and wanted him to reprise Billie Jean or Hello… obviously setting up to give David A. the night.

So. not. shocked.

But I thought that was a fantastic performance that on any other night would have had the judges jumping out of their seats.

David Archuleta chose to reprise “Imagine,” from way back on the tiny stage. Bad idea, I think. These reprise things never end up measuring up to the original performance. Still, it’s intimate and beautiful, and a phenomenal vocal... and far enough away from the original performance that it doesn't beg the comparison outright. But it really was just more of the same from him. Basically, another safe choice. This is a song he's been singing for years in every venue he could play. It's hard for me to be impressed by that. Still, the judges drape him with the winner’s cloak and rant and rave about the greatness that is David A.

… and here’s where I get honest:

If Idol really is about crowning the next hot recording star, and rewarding risks and talent and professionalism and uniqueness, David Cook will win. But it’s not. It’s about anthems and emotionalism and everything that David Archuleta stands for. In the end, the boys have both already won--career-wise, and everyone knows that.

But in my mind, David Cook should take the crown. And maybe he still will…but with Simon and Co. backing Archuleta's safe performances… it’s probably only wishful thinking.

We'll see tomorrow night!

In what will most likely become the most predictable of all result nights this season, Ryan reminds us that at this time next week, we’ll be crowning the next American Idol. And tonight we get to hear Fantasia… but first, we have to hear an embellished trio of voices singing, “Ain’t No Stopping Us Now.”

*sigh*

Will there ever come a day when Idol realizes the sadness and wrong of the group sing? Signs point to no.

But the Ford commercial is up next. And it’s... a commercial.

Ryan announces there were 56 million votes last night. I’m pretty sure about a million of those came from Florida... for David Cook.

And then we get a performance from Fantasia, who I’m convinced is going for Grace Jones’ place in the new millennium… and is one James Bond film away. For real. She sings “Bore Me,” which is high energy, but screamy. So… um, a Fantasia performance. The look on Simon’s face is PRICELESS. AHAHHAHAHAA And totally worth sitting through, um… that.

Oh love. I need more Simon in my world. What will I do without him this summer?

Love me some Nigel, maybe? (SYTYCD = love.)

David Archuleta is summoned to the stage by Ryan to watch his Utah homecoming footage. Television, radio, the mall… it was screamtastic. Highlights? When David was attacked by a cheerleading squad. When he wondered where all the people parked. HA! And when his eye was poked out by the Mayor's crazy mustache… oh wait. That was just in my head. David is a cutie, though. And when he sang “Imagine” for his High School, we’re reminded of his real potential. I really do hope he finds a career niche. He is an amazing vocalist.

As a twist, we’re going to see the AI montage for each of the contestants, just so we don’t miss out on seeing the footage for whoever makes the finale. I actually like the idea, because I’m a sucker for that kind of thing.

Syesha is up next. She was sent back home to Florida… to television, autograph signings… you get the idea. Highlights? When some woman put her baby in Syesha’s arms while she was being ushered past by a police escort. Her pseudo inspirational words for her high school. And some woman named Luann doing a handstand out of love for her Idol. More tears, of course. But instead of endearing her to us, her AI montage makes me sigh. From the pageant statements about sharing her gift with the world, and new reminders of her dad’s drug problem, to the cutsie poses for the camera… eh. I’m still wondering how she made it this far, if I’m being honest. No offense to her fans.

Up last is David Cook, who was sent back to Missouri. Television, radio… blah, blah, blah. Highlights? David Cook the weatherman. His very own Sanjaya-esque crying girl. HA! And the moment between David and his music teacher… Gah! Even his brother was tearing up at the end. Oh cute. And personally, it’s too cool for me to see him still in the competition. I loved him from “Happy Together,” and it’s always nice when enough of the voting public sees what you see in a contestant to keep them in the competition. I’ll definitely miss seeing what he comes up with week after week… but I’ll be first in line for his new album, for sure.

And now we find out who is in the finale… David and David.

… so, Ryan hasn’t said it yet, but it has been written in the stars for weeks. Say what you want, but those two deserve it. They’ve been consistently great throughout the season.

And Syesha is going home. Not shocked about that, but if I’m being honest, I never, ever thought she’d make it past Top 9.

So it’s David and David in the finale!! Can. Not. Wait.

It’s Top 3 night, which means that next week, we’ll learn who wins Idol Season 7… NEXT WEEK! Gah! I’m not ready for it to be over! Oh sadness.

But tonight there are three Idols singing three songs a piece… and we’ve got plenty of filler time, so Ryan intros the judges (you’ll be shocked, but Randy boo’d Simon), and then the Idols were introduced.

David Archuleta starts out the night, singing “And So It Goes,” which is my favorite song ever by Billy Joel. This song was chosen for him by Paula. She thinks there’s a complex melody in this song, but she’s (as usual) totally wrong. The melody is simple, but that doesn’t make the song less difficult to sing. David sings it simply with just the strings at his back, and even a cappella at the beginning. It’s lovely, but kind of passionless. Still, I liked it, until the end. And when he went for the last big run, it was just over sung to me. It’s a beautiful song in its own right. And to be honest, if he’d just sung the song, connected to it, and put his whole heart out on the line, it would have assured him the victory. But, like Simon said, it was good. Nothing unexpected… nothing amazing. But good.

Syesha is up next, singing Randy’s choice for her, “If I Ain’t Got You,” by Alicia Keys. It’s an easy choice for her (read: predictable), but unfortunately is a preview of her coming album release. So… predictable, mediocre R&B – in stores this January!! Seriously. She brought nothing new or exciting to the song. It was totally mediocre compared to the original, but did we really expect Syesha to bring something new to a song? Ever? Um… it was okay. David A.’s got her beat by miles and miles with a lackluster performance of his own.

My love David Cook is up next singing Simon’s choice, Roberta Flack’s “The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.” First, let’s just be straight here. Roberta is my favorite artist evah, for real. So, he really must not disappoint. Hot damn! And he doesn’t. Wow. He started out with just an acoustic guitar back, which was beautiful, and intimate. And you could tell he was holding back for a soft sound, which almost felt unsupported. But then he starts to build as the music builds behind him, until the end, which was just amazing. And I’m always so relieved when he hits those glory notes. Ahahahaha. God, that was brilliant. Randy, evidently, wanted David to have a predictable song like Randy gave Syesha. (Thank God Simon was making the choice.) And I end up agreeing with Paula and Simon. It was brilliant. I thought it was fantastic, and if this isn’t available as a studio version, I shall cry real tears.

And then two win moments back to back… “Round one goes to Cook and Cowell.” Oh, Simon… how I love you… and then Cook winks at his mom and I sigh with fangirly affection.

*happy sigh*

David Archuleta’s second song is delayed by a visit to the Coke Bubbles Stool of Marketing Doom™. But his song choice is next, and he chose “With You,” by Chris Brown… and I have to admit that when I heard the lyrics of the first verse today I started to giggle at the thought of li’l Archie singin’ ‘bout his “boo.” (The giggles actually started in England and then infected me.) But seriously, in no world does Archuleta put out an album like Chris Brown. In. No. World. And the giggles begin anew as David manages to sing the whitest version of that song that ever was sung. (And there are mad covers on YouTube.) Someone needs to point him towards his Josh Grobin future and away from the hip-hop stations. And then he flubs the lyrics again. Ouch, baby. It was pretty much a hot mess. Luckily he has another song to sing, and we can only hope that redeems him, or we’ll have to hear Syesha attack the Cheezy Ballad of Hatred in the finale. David… seriously, now… SAVE US FROM THIS FATE.

And then Ryan calls Simon his boo, and I giggle and purr I delight. Ryan always knows just how to love me when I'm feeling scared.

Syesha announces that she’s going to be singing “Fever” by Peggy Lee, complete with stripper chair and bouncing eyebrow. Her performance was so over the top, that I actually hit rewind so I could close my eyes and just listen to the vocal. And here’s a shocker… the vocal was actually REALLY amazing! Do I love her sultry jazz sound? YES.

Dear Syesha… more of that… Yours in the artist you should be, Claena.

The judges are wrong, of course. Simon’s right that the performance part of it was SUPER cabaret, but the vocal was A. Maz. Ing… so I forgive her for it. Ish. I mean, I'm not forgiving her to the finale or anything. (Damn you, David A, and your words forgettingness.) (I get to make up words because I have an English degree. )

David Cook, who was supposed to sing a Collective Soul song as his choice, is instead singing “Dare You to Move,” by Switchfoot. And Ryan asks him about it from Syesha’s chair… too cute. David plays guitar for himself, which I love. He starts out with some pitch issues, which surprises me from him. (Tired voice?) And then Randy gets his Rock. But even in his element it feels like something is off for David tonight, and it’s just weird. I still love it… and I actually love his voice on this song (um... when it's on key). But just as things start to build, the song’s over and I feel like someone pressed pause right at the good part. Just a weird, weird performance, and a HORRID arrangement. Here’s hoping he’s reserving his voice for the last one.

David A wins for worst song choice of the night, as he sings “Longer” by Dan Fogelberg, selected for him by some nameless producer on a bender. (And we thought they liked him!) He does as well with it as anyone could be expected to. But talk about an overplayed, outdated, yawner of a song. Boring and forgettable… but totally not his fault, this time. Worst. Song. Choice. Evah.

Poor guy. Simon predicts him into the finals, and here’s hoping!

Syesha is up after the break, singing her producer’s choice, “Hit Me Up” by Gia Farrell. It will probably shock no one that I’ve never heard this song in my life. But Syesha shakes her hips and her boot and I suppose she sang it well. Nothing great. Eh. Paula doubts Syesha will make it into the finale… yeah, most people will agree. I think most of us would be surprised to see her there, but you just never know.

After yet another break, David Cook is up. His producer choice is the epitome of predictability, “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing,” by Aerosmith. Sadly, this song makes me think of Armaggedon, the most predictable non-sports movie in recent history. And now, I’m super worried about my love. *sad sigh* He starts out with just strings backing him, which is cool, and then jumps to the bridge for the build. But then rocker Cook, ready-for-sell-out-stadium-gigs comes out in full force, and the audience goes CRAZY. And they should! That was fantastic! The arrangement was really great; I even loved the sustained dissonance at the end. *happy sigh* SO good. Not my favorite performance of his, but I thought it was an awesome end to a mixed night.

Predictions? Nothing new, I’m afraid.

David-squared in the final. Syesha going home. But I think that’s been fated for a while now.

It’s another elimination night, and over 45 million votes came in last night… despite the hot mess of chaos that it was. Tonight will feature two special guests, but first we have to endure a “tribute” to Neil Diamond, via the Group Sing… as if that man hasn’t been destroyed enough by these contestants.

Oh my…

Just. Wrong.

So, do you think Nigel will apologize to Neil in person, or…

With a full hour to fill, and only five contestants to torture, Ryan points out Gina Glockson, Constantfright, and pimps AI Extra.

… yeah. I watch it.

Shut up.

And then recap, which is when I refill my wine glass in a vain attempt to drink the horror of the group sing out of my memory. It doesn’t work, and then I get a double blow, by learning that Paula’s not leaving the show.

Oh, sigh.

Ryan decides it’s time to separate everyone out, and he starts with:

Jason Castro… who is safe.

David Archuleta comes out next, and he’s safe, and yes I’ve written that before Ryan’s done interviewing whoever is nearby with questions that mean nothing. So by the time he actually declares him safe, I’m wondering what next week will bring. Evidently it’s Rock N Roll Hall of Fame. Cool.

Mmm… Ryan. (Sorry… filler makes me lusty.)

And then… THEN! We get a preview of SYTYCD Season 4. Oh yays! I seriously can’t wait. I so love that show more than I should.

Gratuitous Coke reference? On Idol? Someone won something or something. And Randy's a craptastic hand model.

Ryan next calls out my love David Cook. He is safe, because America fears my wrath.

Which means the predictions of a girl-girl bottom two came true. Could we have an all guy top 3 this year? That hasn’t happened yet.
Ryan, of course, doesn’t reveal the eliminated contestant… it’s only half over, people!!

Next up is Natasha Beddingfield, who I haven’t heard of. I attribute that to my lack of pop-listening radio time (and her lack of performances on Graham Norton), but despite its cliché club sound, it’s not a horrible song. And she’s one of the few performers who has managed to be decent while performing on the AI stage. But once her song is over, she goes up to give David A. kisses. Awww.

And then… audience questions:

1. Paula feels for the contestants, and that’s why she’s nicer than the male judges.
2. Paula and Randy may or may not work together in the future, no one can ever tell because the two of them are unintelligible.
3. Simon does indeed remember his first kiss, and his first crush, Tara, actually called in!
4. Ryan thinks 9-years-old is too young to be kissing.

It’s Hybrid commercial time, and the American Idols sing “Catch the Wind” and dress normally for the first time ever.

Neil Diamond is up next singing “Pretty Amazing Grace,” in that sing-speak way of his that only he can seem to pull off. It actually starts off very haunting, but the chorus is a little hokey. So… typical Neil Diamond, I suppose. But he gets a standing ovation, and we get to meet his mom (who so looks like she could fit into Mike Meyer’s Coffee Talk skit). Neil offers up some really decent advice to the Idols, but mostly just tells them to keep at it. Cool.

And here’s where we lose someone. Ryan calls over the girls, and they both look really emotional, despite their earlier stoicism.

And Brooke is going home. She totally breaks down… and is still crying when her good-bye piece is over and it’s time for her to sing. She manages to eke through some of the song… and then my Tivo cuts out, which I’m thinking is a good thing.

And while I’m sad that we lose Brooke, I’ll most likely like her album better if she does it on her own, so I’m pretty glad she’s not up for the big win. And really she went out on one good performance, which is cool.

Rock N Roll next week, kids!

So, it’s Neil Diamond week on idol… And while I understand that he has super mega hits and a bevy of followers, I’m just wondering why the hell they’d choose Neil Diamond as the week when the Idols sing two songs apiece.

Who knows? Maybe it’ll be fantastic… or, um… Neil Diamond-y.

Ryan is still reeling from last week’s elimination, but he manages to push through the pain and introduce the judges… and then the top 5! Yay! Right away I think that David Cook is looking mighty hot, and Syesha is looking extention-y.

Evidently it’s Nouns-as-Adjectives night in Claena’s world… don’t let it distract you.

Jason Castro is singing “Forever in Blue Jeans” and “September Morn” tonight, but he starts with “Forever in Blue Jeans.” You know, this was kind of blah for me. I think I would have loved an acoustic take on this song. As it was, it’s just a little safe and forgettable to me. The judges, though, are staying silent until after the second song. This is probably a time thing, but it’s weird, and I think it’ll suck if someone has a killer first performance and a sucktastic second.

My love David Cook is up next daring to share his soul on the Coke stool. But he turns the table on Ryan, and asks him the questions back. He’s singing “I’m Alive” and “All I Really Need is You” and gives Mr. Diamond chills. (I would squee! here, but the last time we heard "chills" from a mentor it was for KLC ughness.) He starts out with “I’m Alive.” And it’s good, but not amazing. It’s nice to see him do something upbeat and rocky. But it’s not a stretch to take these into rock land. No real impact, and kind of safe, but still decent enough to allow my fangirl out a little.

Brook White is singing next. She’s chosen “I’m a Believer” and “I Am, I Said” as her songs. She starts off with “I’m a Believer”… a cringe-worthy choice, to be sure. And I did not cringe in vain. It was super-karaoke, and she even slipped out another “Woo,” just in time for me to sigh and shake my head in sadness. Eh… here’s hoping this night gets better, because so far I’m less than impressed on every front, and it’s making me cranky.

Best AI sign ever? Yes… “My husband has a man-crush on Ryan” wins on so many levels. But when the fan signs are better than the performances, it's a nasty night on AI.

David Archuleta goes for the most popular songs of the bunch, and is singing “America” and “Sweet Caroline.” I get ready to cringe again as the first strains of “Sweet Caroline” come out, but he does okay with it, actually. He oversings a little in the middle, and the band falls into the cheese track towards the end, but overall it was good. Eh. I’m still not in love with tonight.

Syesha is our last chance for redemption, and is singing “Hello, Again” and “Thank the Lord for the Nighttime” tonight. Right away I know all hope is gone as she sings the heartfelt ballad “Hello, Again” with a stupid, cheesy smile plastered across her face. God this screams “PAGAENT!!” from the mountaintops. It’s like a giant blinking neon sign of sadness with a “Doesn’t Connect to the Lyrics” slogan. Horrid. *sigh*

So, then Ryan brings out all of the Idols and asks the judges to go through and comment as quickly as possible. Randy reveals his favorites are David Cook and David Archuleta by spinning their average performances into goodness. Paula gets confused and comments on Jason’s second song before he’s even sung it. Um… wha?

COULD IT BE HER COMMENTS HAVE BEEN CANNED ALL THIS TIME?!?!!

Paula should have to pee in a cup to qualify for her judging spot. Seriously.

And then Simon speaks the truth to all of them. Although I would have replaced “amateurish” with “cheesy” for David A…. he proclaims Jason forgettable, Cook as barely above average, Brooke a nightmare, and Syesha Old-Fashioned.

Yep.

Still, their “let’s try something new with the judges” experiment was a hot mess.

Please let Round 2 be better…

Jason Castro leads the pack again, singing “September Morn.” And I am SO loving this song for him. It starts off brilliantly, and I wish, wish, wish he would have stayed in that vibe for the whole song. But instead, he lets the orchestra swell, and it went all the way down to fail. You could tell even Jason didn’t like it, as he gets uncomfortable and stands awkwardly, sings without any connection, and ends barely keeping the smile off his face. Sadness.

David Cook is next singing “All I Really Need is You.” He starts off with an orchestra intro, and then breaks off to just his guitar until the chorus, and it’s fantastic! Finally a performance I can rave about! And when he drops back for an acoustic finish, I’m just in love all over again. Oh David… how you saved Neil Diamond night. Fantastic. I really can’t wait to hear the studio version of this. I can’t imagine that I didn’t just hear the best performance of the night right there.

We are pressed for time tonight, but we still manage to eke in Cola-time... yay? But after she stands up for her I’m a Believer mess, Brooke sits at the piano for “I Am, I Said.” I kind of like her on this song, actually. She brings back the folk vibe to it, and even when the icktastic orchestrations come in, she keeps her own sound to it. Nicely done! Yay! Is there hope that I could forget the first half of the show?

Signs point to no.

And because we couldn’t let this song go unsung (DEARGODWHYNOT?!?!), David Archuleta is up next with “America.” I will say ahead of time that if he doesn’t change this up, I’ll hate it. And I hate it. Ugh. No idea what the judges are smoking, but that was just unimpressive to me. It was mid-range, typical, safe, forgettable. He brought so little to the song, it could have been sung at any graduation ceremony across the country. Really bad song choice for him. REALLY, really bad.

Syesha ends the night with “Thank the Lord for the Nighttime.” It starts off very Motown-ish and cool. You can tell she’s having fun with it. And when it veers towards a gospel sound, I’m still digging it. I think it’s the perfect genre mix for her. And I think she’s got to let the ballads go and focus on the high-energy stuff for real. Do I think it’s enough to save her from doom? Eh… not sure. And Simon agrees with me… because he looooooooves me... or... whatever.

Top of the group? David Cook and Brooke (only because we’re ignoring the first songs altogether.)

Bottom? I think it’ll be Jason and Syesha facing elimination… but if Jason’s fangirls text like mad, it could still be a girl-girl bottom two.

All-in-all... I'll still be calling this the Night of Fail. Sadness for Neil Diamond.

It’s results night, and we start off with a group sing of “All I Ask of You.” *sigh* This isn’t the greatest year for blending voices… and it is a tragic hot mess. But… isn’t it always? Still, tonight we have Sir Andrew playing piano and watching the Idols so earnestly, maybe he hopes to imbue harmony skills on them with his mere presence.

Not even his Broadway powers of love can accomplish such a miracle.

But his interview with Ryan was super cute. And we come back from the commercial to see this week’s Ford commercial, sung to the tune of “Tainted Love.” The, um… plot? is David A. drawing the contestants comic book style… and they look super hot and full of win.

Um… so, I might be a bit of a comic geek. Shhhhhhhh.

The president approves of Idol Gives Back. Yay.

And then Ryan announces that tonight we will have a bottom 2 instead of a bottom 3, and then brings out the two Davids… or the poised and the awkward.

They are, of course, both safe. And we’re probably looking at the top 2 right there… not that I’d make a prediction or anything.

When we come back, Ryan starts to list off the Idols that have been or are on Broadway.

Diana DeGarmo (Hairspray)
Fantasia (The Color Purple)
LaKisha (The Color Purple)
Tamyra Gray (Rent)
Clay Aiken (Spamalot)

Um… Clay and Leona Lewis on the same night? Is anyone else hearing screams and faints from Florida? Can someone please revive adoraheatherlyfor me?

Leona Lewis from the UK’s X-Factor comes out next to sing her hit “Bleeding Love.” (I personally liked his Joss Stone discovery more… but that’s just a question of style. They’re both talented as hell.) Ooo… fire. If I’m being honest, she’s better than that song.

Ryan calls out Syesha and Brooke next. Anyone taking bets? You probably shouldn’t. After rambling answers to dumb questions, Brooke is safe and Syesha is in the bottom two. Wow. Didn’t expect that at all.

That leaves Jason and Carly, who come out to join Ryan after the break. And in another shock, Jason is safe and Carly is in the bottom two.

This is the weirdest year for results nights. Seriously.

But Syesha and Carly sign their songs again, which is cool for us, kind for them (not to have to sing while crying). And really, whoever goes home, they definitely go home on a super high note. But one has to go home, and tonight, Carly is going home. Sadness.

Well, next week we get Neil Diamond… really? Two songs a piece on NEIL DIAMOND night?!?!?!

… save me.

It’s Andrew Lloyd Webber night… show tunes anyone? And tonight the orchestra is on the stage. Very cool. ALW seems like a super cool mentor, though, prodding the Idols to focus on the lyric and the story. Yay!

Syesha starts off the night singing “One Rock N Roll Too Many,” from Starlight Express. She jumps the piano and starts off rhythm, but the beauty of a live band is that they adjust… and they did. And talk about her element. She totally plays it up. She looks fantastic and sounds fantastic. I thought it was really good. She should totally go after Broadway as a career for real. She seriously just came alive… like for the first time tonight. Even Simon thought it was sexy!

Up next is Jason Castro singing “Memory” from Cats. But first he has to live amongst the Cola bubbles of ad-mania. He admits he’s not quite a musicals type of guy. Um, duh. And can I just say now that Andrew Lloyd Webber is making me like him more with every clip? LOVE HIM. Jason sings from a stool, with no instrument in his lap, no amazing lights… just him and the song. And I thought he was mesmerizing. It wasn’t a fantastic vocal, or a performance to bring down the house. But it was beautiful, and heartfelt, and I loved it.

Brooke is singing “You Must Love Me” from Evita. Sadly, she has another false start, and even gets the orchestra to start over for her. The vocal was good, but it seemed like a really safe song to me. It’s not a hard song to sing, but it is dramatic song. And that’s kind of where it all broke down for me. ALW says she’s a natural actress, but for the first time, she seemed just so fake as she sang… like she didn’t really connect to the song, but she was pretending to. Weird? I don’t know why I felt that way, but I did.

David Archuleta is up next, but we do have to get two Coke interviews in or the world ends. But tonight, David is singing “Think of Me,” from Phantom. He’s the only Idol so far that puts a more modern, non-show spin on the song, which surprises me. It’s kind of a cool take on the song, but more importantly, David just has such a beautiful voice. It’s a little safe, maybe, but I’m sure his fanbase will eat it up. Not the stand-out it could have been.

We come back and Carly Smithson is being told NOT to sing “All I Ask of You.” (thankyouverymuch, Andrew) Instead, she’s singing “Jesus Christ, Superstar.” I love this kind of Rock/Gospel feel on her… like love it more than anything she’s sung all season, without exception. (And her dress… want.) That was just freaking amazing! I LOVED that song on her. And that is what she should have been doing from day 1. Tons of energy, great vocal. The judges are on crack to not be totally applauding this. Love her.

David Cook ends the night singing “Music of the Night” from Phantom. And… oh.my.god. I’m fangirling out all over the place. All season I’ve secretly wanted him to just get up there and sing a ballad. And he did! It started off a little awkward, but he totally fell into step with the feel of the song… and then just slammed out the high notes. I mean, showing off his pipes here! It was just beautiful. Fantastic vocal, and I love him more and more… is that even possible?

And then Ryan sings and my life is complete.

And the girls love David… duh. (erm... me too.)

Top? CARLY, Syesha, CARLY, David Cook, CARLY… oh love for Carly tonight.

Bottom… I think, sadly, it’s gonna be Brooke. But at this point it can be more about fanbase than performance. So, I guess we’ll see.